When we start out in a relationship we’re usually pretty good at making time for each other, spending quality time together and generally enjoying each other’s company. Fast forward to a while later and when life gets in the way, we’re often too busy to make time for ourselves, let alone our significant other!
But, finding ways to reconnect with your partner needn’t be costly or time-consuming. Check out this post on 20 ways to bond with your partner when busy life gets in the way.
BUILDING A STRONG RELATIONSHIP
For many reasons it’s important to build and maintain strong relationships that are mutually supportive, respectful and fun. Yet, when you’ve been at work all day, been chasing after little ones or just generally been busy throughout the day, finding the time and energy to work on your relationship can be tricky.
Here are some simple and intentional ways to reconnect with your partner that are realistic, practical and fit in with your every-day life.
WAYS TO STRENGTHEN YOUR RELATIONSHIP
#1 Cook a meal and eat it together (it can be breakfast before the kids get up!).
#2 Each make a list of five things you love about the other person.
#3 Find an interest that you can share together and make time to do it.
#4 Tell each other about your day and ask questions about what happened.
#5 Discuss how you would describe each other to someone you didn’t know.
#6 Make a list of 3 things that you’d like to improve in your relationship. Be honest with yourself and each other.
#7 Talk about shared memories of good times, for example, what was your best holiday and why?
#8 Explore ways you can weave more time for each other into your calendar.
#9 Pick and agree your favourite 3 things to do together.
#10 Work out what your strengths and weaknesses are as a couple. What things do you do well together and what areas do you struggle in? Acknowledge that you both need to work on certain areas together.
#11 Talk about where you’d like to be in 5 or 10 years’ time and what steps you need to take to get you there.
#12 Try never to go to bed on an argument as you never know what tomorrow will bring.
#13 Discuss what you jointly see as priorities for you and your kids (if you have them). Explore ways to put them first regularly.
#14 Don’t forget the power of both your words and actions. When you love someone, the impact of what you say and what you do is magnified because we care more. Make a conscious effort to use the right words and actions even though it’s tempting to get lazy or take our partners for granted.
#15 Go for a walk and enjoy just being with each other.
#16 Do something spontaneous and unexpected for each other.
#17 Find ways to laugh together because life isn’t all that fun sometimes and we forget to see the funny side.
#18 Respect each other as individuals.
#19 Share the load and act as a team – split the chores, taking turns in cooking or bathing the kids. If one of you is struggling, it helps if the other one steps in and offers support or to help in some way. Don’t always take an answer of ‘I’m fine’ as the final answer. Offer to make dinner or suggest your partner has some quiet time whilst you take care of the kids! It depends on the dynamics of who does what in your home and how you react to offers of help when either of you are struggling.
#20 Make a list of your strengths as a couple. What do you do well when you’re working together?
Finding time to bond with your partner when you have daily responsibilities can be difficult but the ideas I’ve shared here will give you some practical, simple suggestions for you and your partner to work on together.
If you’d like to learn more about how to maintain your relationship when you have kids then you might like this post on passion after kids!
And, if the problem is more a question of time (or lack of it!) then you might like this post on how to find time for self care or how to simplify your calendar and be more intentional with your time.